GAY WIZARD WORLD HAIKU

I have written a Haiku to express my absolute joy & felicity at the thought of our trip south to the city of Brotherly Love & Lou Ferigno:

Ah, Wizard World East,
Comics, Booze, Fan Boys, Titties
It never gets old.

WIZARD WORLD PHILLY 06'

It's Con season again!

This June 2-4 the TP crew will be attending Wizard World Philly at Table 1147. Our buddies Ken Knudtsen and Jerry Ma will be at tables 1182 & 1183. If you manage to visit all three tables, you may be crawling from the bathroom to the exit by the end of the day. I know we will be. Have you ever seen one of those Pantera home videos? If all goes well, that's what our video should look like this year. If we remember to turn the camera on.

Also, make sure to check the newly added slideshow in the right side menu during the weekend, it will be updated live for the duration of our trip.

As far as Terminal Press merch, since it is a Con, you will once again have the opportunity to pick up our Con-Exclusive Alternate Cover Phony-Baloney Comic along with the Phony-Baloney toys and the Con Exclusive Toxic Teddies Comic and get em' all signed.

See ya in Philly!

DRAGONFORCE SHREDDING

VIDEO GAMES MAKE YOU Wii-TARDED

I beat Oblivion. New Super Mario Bros. should be in my possession tonight. All the news coming out of E3 last week has me wishing I had a house to mortgage in order to afford all that pixelated pleasure. I am a game addict and proud of it.

What is the coolest thing that could happen to a gaming fiend such as myself? The opportunity to pitch some ideas to a major game publisher. This is exactly the opportunity that I have this week.

I can't divulge all the details, but you can bet they have no idea what to expect from the crazy bastards who put out comic titles like Silent Assassin & Crowpsey. I hope they did their research before inviting us in, otherwise they may be kicking us out of the building very quickly.
Besides pitching all of our titles as game ideas, we have one new idea that we came up with specifically as a game pitch. It is ridiculous and something someone with my warped sensibilities would definitely want to play.

Depending on how things go, maybe I'll be able to give you a taste sometime soon.

Wish us luck if you want Terminal Press invading your consoles sometime in the future!

I CAN'T WAIT FOR BORAT MOVIE. IT IS NICE!

GET OFF OUR ISLAND

The Guido is an entirely American phenomena, with its epicenter in the New York/ New Jersey metropolitan area. Most individuals become Guidos in an attempt to achieve an identity- in fact any identity. The Guido is highly recognizable by his attention to muscular development, status symbols, and regional dialect.

Their shortcomings include a tendency toward alcoholism, legal problems (usually related to assault, reckless driving, noise violations), and an inability to compete in legitimate business. Fortunately for them, they usually live an exciting, care-free existence. They are easily satiated by tacky mall attire, drunken nights with similar-minded women, and nightclubbing. In the end, although they maintain a unique sense of identity and pride, their superficial lives often leave them empty. The tolls of excessive grooming products, STDs, and alcohol abuse age these specimens quite poorly. The time spent in fitness clubs is usually far offset by their lifestyle choices.

A FUN RECAP OF FIRE AND ORFICE PENETRATION

That's me, lookin like a cool dude. That's not a real thick masculine mustache. It's actually part of the breathing apparatus. A sexy manly breathing apparatus.

These are my awesome insides. Don't you feel like we have an intimate relationship now? It's only fair that I should get to see your insides as well.

This is an apartment fire. Candles are dangerous. Falling asleep with a candle lit is just stupid and not very fair to your neighbors.

NASSAU COUNTY POLICE OFFICER S. RYAN BADGE # 2830 STATION 421

This has been one of those weeks.

Our building caught fire on Friday, after dashing through smoke and flames and arriving outside in our pajamas, some lady backed into my car twice in a panic to get out of the way of the fire trucks, my wife's car was the victim of a hit and run while she was out at work on Monday, I went for an endoscopy this morning and on the way back this complete white trash douche-bag pig of all pig cops pulled us over for thinking we were speeding. Not an actual speeding ticket with a specific speed clocked on a radar, a suspicion of speeding. The waste of life was outside of his car as we passed, got in and pulled us over at the next light. Honestly, we were not speeding. Some old lady smoking a cigarette was swerving into our lane, my wife honked and pulled around her. When we tried to explain this, the genius got annoyed that we didn't just suck his dick like he wanted us to and tacked on another ticket for obstructed view because of our air freshener.
He was definitely one of those guys who felt like a big man picking on the general public because he has no control over his personal life and the repressed feelings of homosexuality his feeble pig brain is unable to deal with.
NASSAU COUNTY POLICE OFFICER S. RYAN BADGE # 2830 STATION 421. You are a fucking joke. You have now been documented and become searchable by anyone with a computer and access to google. You might as well take your leap out of the closet so you can direct some of that aggression somewhere more productive. Like sucking on the tailpipe of your car like the cock you wish it was.
Fuck you.